September 30, 2009

A not-so-ordinary Life

So today's a pretty special day for me. Today I celebrate the anniversary of my death. Yep you read right, on this day 25 years ago my mother came in to find me clinically dead in my cot... It's a pretty interesting story (or at least I think so!)... So get yourself comfortable and let me tell you all about one of the most defining moments of my life...

I was born in Brisbane but I had my first overseas plane trip when I was around 8 days old -- and I had my second overseas plane trip when I was 13 days old. But I'm getting ahead of myself... My family lived in Papua New Guinea (PNG) at the time because my dad was a missionary pilot up there so my mum, my two brothers along with the new addition (me!) were going back home. All appeared fine until my mum came to check on me on the morning of the 30th of September.

Mum was concerned that I wasn't making the usual waking up noises. When she saw me she instantly knew something was wrong, something was VERY wrong. For one thing I was a unusual colour and when she searched for a heartbeat or breath she found neither. Now my mum is a highly trained nurse and her fist thought was that it was all too late to save me; that I was already gone. About that time my dad came crashing through the room and started resuscitation efforts. Mum and another missionary nurse got into the act so I had other people breathing for me and making my little heart beat.

I was in obvious need of serious medical attention so we needed to get me to Australia and quick so a quick drive down to the airstrip with the whole family was in order. Once we got to the airstrip there was nothing short of a miracle - a doctor was there. Now you have to understand, these are third world conditions we are talking about; there were no doctors. But just when we needed one, one just happened to be there.

There are a great many little stories along the way such as random pilots giving their oxygen tanks to my dad to try and keep me alive. Some where during the flight to Australia I started to take a few breaths on my own.

When we were safely in an Australian hospital and I was hooked up to a great many machines the doctors pulled my parents aside. It was suggested that it might be the most humane thing to just let me go - my parents weren't exactly keen on the idea.

But I pulled through those first rocky days. Still the doctors
outlook wasn't good but I just kept getting better. My parents were told I'd be in a vegetated state or at least severely disabled. I'd never walk, write, talk, read or lead anything resembling a fulfilling life.

Now look at my life -- it didn't turn out how it was supposed to. I walk - yes with a bit of a limp but it's still walking, I drive a normal car, I talk (some may say a little too much!), I write - poetry, novels, speeches, assignments, I read - I'm studying English Literature at university and maintaining an A average, I have an active social life and I'm living my life to the fullest. I'm not writing this for all to say how great I am...

I'm writing this to say that you can do whatever you want. Don't let others put limitations on you. I could have quite easily said "I
have cerebral palsy and it's all too hard (and sometimes it is a struggle)" but my parents always told me to reach for the stars and that way even if you miss you'll end up amongst the stars. Life is there to be lived so why not have fun with it? Why not embrace life and who you are and enjoy the ride? Except nothing less that YOUR best - not anyone else's best but yours!

Most of all enjoy who you are! I love being able to look back at my life and see how far I've come. I intend to make the most of the li
fe and live it to it's fullest and not waste a minute on regret. What about you?


Words of Wisdom

With so much wisdom out there it's hard to narrow things down into a couple of words of wisdom. But there's a phrase that were given to me as a child - by my astonishingly wise parents - that has stuck with me and helped me all through my life and will no doubt continue to inspire me.

- God don't make junk!
This one was particularly helpful to me growing up. For those who haven't read my blog I have a disability - mild cerebral palsy - and there were times when I would question why I wasn't 'normal'. Particularly after the other kids in the playground were mean to me - I couldn't understand why I was different. I started to think that God had made a mistake when He was creating me... But my parents and other lovely people reminded me and continue to remind me that just because I'm different doesn't mean I'm junk. Just because I'm not classically beautiful doesn't mean I'm not beautiful in my own way. This little phrase let me fully embrace who I am and not worry about what others think of me... All that really matters is what God thinks of me and that He thinks I'm beautiful! By being just who I am - nothing more, nothing less - I have amassed a group of wonderful friends and fantastic family who love me as I am. What more could a girl ask for?

September 27, 2009

Oh Bloggerdom how I have missed thee...

It occurs to me that it has been ages since I have last posted... I have strangely missed it - feeling slightly detached from a part of myself. I can only blame uni, work, sickness and unending busyness. But excuses no more!

There is a build up of words in my soul just aching for release. So I shall post my own words again soon. But to get me back into the blogging spirit I will share one of my favorite poems... This poem is by Christian Rossetti and it's entitled Remember

Remember me when I am gone away,
Gone far away into the silent land;
When you can no more hold me by the hand,
Nor I half turn to go yet turning to stay.
Remember me when no more day by day
You tell me of our future that you planned:
Only remember me; you understand
It will be late to counsel then or pray.
Yet if you should forget me for a while
And afterwards remember, do not grieve:
For if the darkness and corruption leave
A vestige of the thoughts that once I had,
Better by far you should forget and smile
Than that you should remember and be sad.

Melancholy I know... But those words contain such depth of feeling I cannot help but be swept away...

The words belong to Christina Rossetti - the picture belongs to me...